BPD resources for family members
In case of emergency
Crisis centres can help you 24/7. Click here for a list.
Suicide prevention hotline: click here or call Suicide Action Montreal (514-723-4000).
Or call 911.
Click on the blue links below to access articles, videos, and other resources.
Guidelines and Training for Family Members
Borderline Personality Disorder Family Guidelines
A 16 page booklet providing essential guidance to parents of teens or of adult children struggling with Borderline Personality Disorder. It covers information such as managing crisis and limit setting.
Top 10 questions families have asked AMI over the years about communicating with a loved one experiencing emotional dysregulation or Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). The answers might surprise you!
BPD & Teens: What parents want to know!
Is your teen’s moodiness typical of adolescence or could this be signs of a mental health issue? This article provides information about borderline personality disorder and resources for parents of teens.
Family Connections Program for family members, partners and friends
This 12 week free program (2 hours a week, in person or online) offered by the Sashbear Foundation empowers families with life transforming skills. It’s an excellent opportunity for families to learn how to support and better communicate with a loved one with BPD.
AMI-Quebec programs for families, partners and friends of a loved one with BPD
SOS Famille
A free counseling service for family members or partners who have a loved one struggling with Borderline Personality Disorder. Talk to someone who understands and can help you with the challenges you are facing.
Borderline Personality Disorder for Families support group
Facilitated by a trained volunteer, this support group is a safe, welcoming space where family members and partners of a person with BPD can share their experiences. It can be a great source of comfort during difficult times to meet with other people going through similar experiences as yours. It is held online once a month, and there is no need to register in advance.
Registration is required for the following workshops:
Introduction to Borderline Personality Disorder
A basic introduction to Borderline Personality Disorder, emotional dysregulation, and how you might get started when wanting to support a loved one who has been diagnosed with BPD or who has great difficulty regulating their emotions. This two hour presentation is held three times a year and is followed by a question and answer period.
Hands on Practice for Challenging Situation
Validation is an excellent skill to use to improve the relationship with your loved one. Although the idea is simple–we want our loved one to feel heard and understood–we may struggle using this skill. This two hour interactive workshop is held three times a year. It allows participants to identify what might get in the way of validation and to explore some concrete real life situations through role play.
BPD Emotion Regulation workshop with Sylvie & Carl
This two hour workshop (held once a year) offers basic information about emotion regulation and is open to both family members, partners, and friends as well as individuals diagnosed with BPD or struggling to regulate their emotions.
Videos and Articles
Watch Carl’s story: Living with Borderline Personality Disorder
Carl co-facilitates AMI-Quebec’s yearly BPD Emotion Regulation workshop. He has touched the minds and hearts of many. In this powerful video, he shares his own lived experience with BPD.
Validation: Making Sense of the Emotional Turmoil in Borderline Personality Disorder
In this webinar, Dr. Galen defines validation and invalidation and provides practical examples of different forms of validation with your loved one.
Videos:
Laura MacMartin has facilitated many workshops on Validation at AMI-Quebec. In this webinar, in addition to defining validation and invalidation, she explains the different ways to validate your loved one and how to use this skill to end the “blame game”.
This special event was held by the MUHC Personality Disorders Program in collaboration with AMI-Quebec in 2022. Dr. Choi-Kain is a clinician and professor at Harvard Medical School who is a BPD expert. In this video, she provides practical advice that families can implement in difficult situations.
Coping with BPD: a sibling’s perspective (presented at the 2014 Annual APA meeting)
In this presentation Sara talks about her own lived experience as a sibling of a loved one with BPD and about how the family found support and guidance at a family organization (TARA4BPD) to better navigate the situation.
BPD Strategies & techniques for parents and partners
With Dr. Daniel Fox (a psychologist specialized in the treatment and assessment of personality disorders). In this video, Dr. Fox provides four things you can do to help your loved one with BPD.
Valerie Porr is the founder of TARA4BPD in New York. In this presentation, she explains Borderline Personality Disorder and how families, partners, and friends can help.
In this presentation, Dr. Fruzzetti explores how to promote healthy conflict, what makes a family healthy and how to find peace in the family.
Perry D. Hoffman & Lynn Courey
In the first part of this presentation, Dr. Hoffman defines Borderline Personality Disorder. In the second part, Lynn Courey (founder of Sashbear) addresses the impact of BPD on families.
En français:
Hélène Busque
Cette presentation guide les membres de l’entourage afin qu’ils puissent aider un proche qui souffre d’un trouble de personnalité limite.
Other videos:
How to Spot the 9 Traits of Borderline Personality Disorder
Very comprehensive website offering a wealth of information and resources to both individuals with BPD and their families.
Many very useful archived webinars on BPD, Dialectical Behavior Therapy, emotion regulation, etc.
Articles from our newsletter, Share & Care
Validation: the Communication of Acceptance Part 1–What is Validation Page 2
An edited summary of Dr. Galen’s webinar on Validation. Part 1 – What is validation and some concrete examples.
Validation: the Communication of Acceptance Part 2–How to Validate Page 2
An edited summary of Dr. Galen webinar on Validation. Part 2 – How to validate and some concrete examples.
Tips for Families Struggling With Mental Illness Page 1
25 tips to help families cope and to improve their relationship with their loved one. Based on a McLean webinar with a family member.
Websites
Websites:
https://amiquebec.org/support/
List of support groups offered at AMI-Quebec. BPD for Families is specifically for family members and partners who have a loved one with BPD.
https://amiquebec.org/borderline/
Community organisations providing support and guidance to families as well as a list of hospital and clinics that provide treatment for BPD in the Montreal region (a referral may be needed).
https://amiquebec.org/suicide/
http://www.borderlinepersonalitydisorder.com/
The National Education Alliance for Borderline Personality Disorder (NEABPD) provides education, research and resources for both the person with BPD and their families.
https://www.facebook.com/NEABPD/
Facebook page of the National Education Alliance for Borderline Personality Disorder.
On the website of the Sashbear foundation you will find information about Borderline Personality Disorder, a free program providing skills to families, and a wealth of videos from experts in the field.
A not-for-profit organization that aims to reduce stigma, raise awareness and empower families. They offer a number of virtual workshops to family members and partners of a person with BPD to improve relationships and communication with their loved ones.
The Ottawa Network for Borderline Personality Disorder offers resources and workshops (some in person, some virtual) to families and friends of a person with BPD.
http://www.douglas.qc.ca/info/trouble-personnalite-limite
Causes, symptomes et traitements du Trouble de Personnalité Limite (TPL) – en français.
http://www.aqpamm.ca/ressources/fiches-maladies/le-trouble-de-la-personnalite-limite/
Ateliers, services et informations à propos du trouble de la personnalité limite, offerts aux membres de l’entourage.
Books and Publications for Family Caregivers
Borderline Personality Disorder: An Information Guide for Families
This free CAMH publication is a well done, brief book that talks about BPD in plain language. Click HERE to download.
I Don’t Have to Make Everything All Better, by Gary and Joy Lundberg
An excellent preparation for parents who have a hard time understanding and using validation.
Loving someone with a borderline personality disorder: How to keep out-of-control emotions from destroying your relationship, by Shari Manning
Overcoming BPD: a family guide for healing and change, by Valerie Porr
Big book to read, but lots of very useful information. Written by the founder of TARA organization for BPD. Valerie Porr has a daughter with BPD too. Based on research, DBT informed and based on personal lived experience as well.
Parenting a teen who has intense emotions: DBT Skills to help your teen Navigate Emotional & Behavioral Challenges, by Pat Harvey and Britt Rathbone
Written for parents of teens, but this book is good for any caregiver of a person with BPD; book is short, to the point and a very good intro to DBT skills for families.
Talking to a Loved One With Borderline Personality Disorder by Jerold J. Kreisman
When Your Daughter Has BPD by Daniel S. Lobel
These books and others about BPD are available at our office. You can borrow them from our library if you are an AMI-Quebec member.
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